top of page
TwitterBanner.png

About Us

Bad news, when you least expect it, and when you don't want it.

Setting out with a vison of greatness in mind, a woman from a small family-owned bee farm journeyed to the South. The vision? To get away from the bees! Never did she expect to end up creating a newspaper without structure. Never did she think she would manage a small team of unhinged people who riot every chance they get. But here she is, trying to figure out why she spent some of her hard-earned savings on a shitty satire paper. But she’s invested to make the crappiest paper in all of the South!

 

Yee-Haw!!

Staff

Story Onyx 

Socialist who wishes the world was at peace. She loves horror and dry humor and calls out bigots in the art of writing. She often argues with Raven on how to go about things.

Raven Poe

​Democratic socialist who wants people to be able to afford rent. He opposes aggressive tactics and wants decent conversation with the alt-right to resolve issues.

Horrible Streamer

Misty Mountain

A pyromaniac at best, a pyromaniac at worst. Hey! At least she knows who she is. We definitely want her on our side when hail comes. Ice, ice baby? More like, set fire to the rain!

Smokey Bombshell

Crowning Phoenix

Moderate who's angry at the rise of  white supremacy. While he's allergic to bees, he feels a calling to aid in the boss' mission. We think he just has a crush on her...

Good Samaritan

Writer

Hight IQ Bird

Writer

Writer

Editor

Marketer

Ghastly Sage

Shadow Ninja

Catholic moderate who loves to confront Nazis. It's what Jesus would want him to do. He must listen to Jesus. Thinking he's an instrument of God, he wants all hateful people to go eat a raw blowfish.

Boss

Boss

Recovering Beekeeper

Publisher and owner of The Beekeeper News, this bitch prefers to stay anonymous. Like the bees she once kept, she has a sting. But unlike their sweet honey, hers is sour.

Disclaimer:  All names are God-given names. Cope.

bottom of page